It's my birthday month and most years I celebrate by vacationing at the beach. This year I chose mother's day weekend to celebrate my birthday. I invited my sister to tag along so she can play tennis while I beach it. I have a great love for the beach it started at age 10 when my childhood friend invited me to spend time at her family beach house over the summer.
Playing on the beach early in the mornings and breathing in the ocean is one of my favorite things to do. I love taking pictures and this particular morning I'm working on a new technique. I needed a prop so I decided to use the beach rental chairs. It's going great I am having so much fun. In the background I hear the lifeguard testing her whistle and as she begins her morning walk, she blows her whistle again. Now I look around because it's early and I am thinking what is the alert for. As she is walking in my direction she says "get away from the chairs!" I start walking toward her saying "am I making you nervous taking selfies?" Her reply is "it looks like you’re trying to steal the chairs. What? Really? She has to be kidding right? Then she proceeds to tell me it looks like I am picking the lock. WOW! I had no idea how to even respond to this accusation. I know y'all want to know how I handled this situation. Well, better than I anticipated. I just shook my head and said "Wow this is a very low key family oriented beach and I have been coming here since 19. I am really shocked people actually try to steal these 50 lb. rental chairs. What is this world coming to"? At this point I just walked away.
I am a 53-year-old female dancing around in the sand like a fool and she thought I was going to steal chairs (you all know the ones, webbed teak chairs with footrest that only come in blue and green that have been around since the 70's).Why would anybody steal one of these chairs? Where can you go with it? You can’t even lift them. Needless to say I was so humiliated my emotional health took a beating. I was so deflated at that moment all the joy was sucked out of my morning. I let this young lady wreck my emotional spirit. The more I processed this scene the more upset I became. I allowed her words to hurt me emotionally.
It does not end there, later that afternoon I went to the tiki hut for a cocktail. I'm in line behind a older man placing his order. The bartender waits on me and I reply by saying "can I have a crown on the rocks?" At this moment the man in front of me says "no you can not!" What? (i'm thinking he is being funny) The bartender looks at me like what the heck, immediately the man goes into a diatribe about how I used the wrong grammar. He proceeds to tell me "it is not can I, it is may I have and what is wrong with you people. I'm trying to teach my grandkids the difference and they won't listen either." I ignore him and walk off with him still in disgust. Did I want to dress him down? absofreakinglutely!! Did he humiliate me? Nope, he was acting the fool! His adult bullying was a classic example of trying to humiliate me. Well, bully on you!
I have been curious as to why God or the universe put these people in my path and honestly it was probably a test to see how I would react to them. Reflecting on these two situations I want to share a few pointers I discovered about myself.
I walked off instead of responding. I took the bully's power away! Good for me.
I stood up for myself when the life guard accused me of picking a lock to steal a beach chair.
I found humor in both situations after reflecting.
I learned I need to be less accusatory in my day as well. Less taking of others inventory. That's on them.
I can not change who you are only you can. I can only take responsibility for my actions
Be proud of who you are. Learn to ignore the ugly it's everywhere.
I can try my best to be the bigger person and be positive to others.
Restart your day at any time do not let others define you.
Do not suffer in silence have 1or 2 emergency contacts to share your frustrations with.
Gratitude check: what am I grateful for each day. Keep the positive focus on you and do not let others rob you of your JOY!
I am here for you! I challenge you to be your best self. Some days are more difficult than others. No joke!! ... and do not let others humiliate you!
Until next time.......
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